CARPE DIEM

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Monday, August 30, 2010

Sometimes, We always seem to be caught in between a rock and a hard place

I have never been fond of any forms of things that could be left up to someone's own intepretation (Me doing it on purpose to someone else not withstanding!)

I like knowing where everything stands.
In it's own little compartment even though it might be messy to someone else's eyes,
as long as I know where it belongs, I'm happy.

I dislike entering my own personal pigsty (dubbed by mum regarding my room) and find something NOT where I left it.
*Glares at my family members*

Suddenly, the feeling of an invasion of privacy intrudes.

I DON'T LIKE.

Another thing I don't look upon with favour would be not knowing where I stand.
Or where people stand in my life.

Like Mia is my muzzer who i have a love-hate relationship with (Imagine me whining to her when Im sick and me walking away from her the moment she opens her mouth to nag at my awesome pigsty)
Like Adik is my ELDER sister who i have a manja-hate relationship with (I sleep with her whenever I'm emotionally unstable and she will ALWAYS kick me in the night and steal my pillow away)
Like Rokiah is my bff who i will bitch with everyday without fail (omg minus points man during fasting month) and scream at her for dumping me for her boyfriend HAHA.

I could go on, really I can.

I'm not those extrovert types (YES CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF) who could make friends with a twinkle of the eye and an easy smile.
It takes me months for me to warm up to someone.
Even longer for me to start to trust.

I go around with an arrogant face (totally unintentional i tell you, I only realise when people told me their FIRST impression of me, oh my.)
Sticking close to those I know and love.

I don't need millions of friends to feel loved.
I don't need millions of friends texting me all day long to catch up and gossip and stuff like that.
It's ok if people come up to me and tell me I don't have many friends.
It's ok.
In fact, I'm proud of it.
Because I know, those that I DO have, I can count on.
without fail.

Ambiguouity (sp??) and me, we tend to avoid each other like the plague.
I will fight to clear the air, with whoever.
(hence being nicknamed as the confrontational one, ha ha)

So forgive me, really,
if I don't give you the time of the day when i tried to find out where we stand and you refuse to answer.
There is no such thing as 'I don't Know'.

You were something beautiful once.

Who else hates that!?

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